March 2011
2 posts
Texts from my new friend.
I was stopped on my way out of the bathroom the other day at work. The janitor was waiting for those in the ladies' room to exit so he could clean. He was crouched over the railing in the stairwell, talking on his phone, his face obstructed by the mask he was wearing. I passed him and was about to scan myself into our suite, when...
Crazy Janitor (CJ): "Girl, you're pretty. Can I get your number?"
Me: "Aww, thanks. Too kind."
CJ: "No, girl, I mean it. Let me get your number. My name is X."
Me, utilizing my go-to response: "Thanks, X, but I'm seeing someone."
CJ: 'That's ok. I just wanna be friends."
I was holding my phone (damn it!).
CJ: "Let me get your number, and I'll call you so you have my number in your phone."
I caved, gave him my number, waited for him to call my phone, then excused myself back to work. Not 10 minutes later, I get a text.
CJ: "Are you buisy?"
Buisy? Surely just a one-time error. And of course I was busy; I was working. I waited to text him until I got home.
Me: "Not anymore; made it home. :) "
CJ: "That's good u made it home sweetness. ;-) I would call and chat but Im at a poetry readin and getting ready to recite in thirty miniutes. will u be up?"
The dreaded "u". I use proper grammar when I text, and as such, can be a bit of a snob. But, a poetry reading? Maybe I can overlook this.
Me: "Possibly! Text me when you're done. If I'm up, I'll let you know."
Time goes on. At 12;40, my phone rings. Hey, waitaminute. That's not a text. I didn't answer.
He called the next morning at 9;45. Too early.
Me, by text once I got to work: ""Hey! I missed your call this morning; I was getting ready for work. I live in Cleveland so have a long commute. How was your poetry reading? Where do you go?"
CJ: "It was great. My uncle owns a club he allows me to throw poetry events at. I also attend various events at different vinues. Its fun . How was ur evening?"
Me: "It was pretty good. Got out of work a little late, then relaxed with a show before heading to bed."
CJ: "That's my favorite thing to do i love a good show b4 bed. Or just simply cuddling."
There. There it is. By now I've related the saga to my cube-mate, L.
L: "Girl, what did I tell you. I knew that was coming."
CJ: "Are you buisy?"
Again with the buisy. He must have it auto-programmed into his phone, and it's spelled incorrectly.
Me: "Yeah, at work on the phones. :) What are you up to today?"
CJ: "Getting off of job 1 and heading to [our work place]. :) "
Me: " What else do you do? Anything exciting?"
CJ: "I work at a body shop and I do a lil p.i. work on the side."
What the?
L: "So he's a janitor, mechanic, private investigator, AND a poet?"
Me: "So it would seem."
L: "He'll be sexin' you up soon, just you wait."
Me: "What? Maybe he is a nice guy. Certainly ambitious, if this is all true."
L eyed me before laughing.
Later that evening...
CJ: "Are you buisy?"
*sighs*
Me: "Yeah. :( Just got home a little bit ago and have to pay attention to the dog. Now a movie with the boyfriend. I can text, though!"
Hey, it wasn't a lie. My ex and I were instant-queuing a Netflix movie to watch together while we chatted over Ventrilo. He is a friend, and a boy, so that counts.
CJ: "How was your day? As beautiful as u i hope ;-) "
Me: "Aww. :p Not a bad day. How about you?"
CJ: "Pretty good. I wrote another poem, finished a car and got another business to buy fruit salads this spring. I thought of ur lovely smile 2day. :)"
How does this work?
Me: "Buy fruit salads? So you'll be selling them? Yum! What kind of poetry do you write?"
CJ: "Yup. every summer fresh fruit salads. I have two stores that buy in bulk. All kinds of poetry. love, anger, spiritual, happy, sad, sex. All kinds, based on how I feel. I wrote a sexy one 2day. ;-)"
Oh, no. Let me guess.
CJ: "like I said. I thought of ur smile 2day. ;-)"
Does this guy's game work on other ladies out there? Really? I'll keep going, though. I'm holding on to hope!
Me: "Awesome! I do like poetry, I write myself. Also into photography when I can. Majored in English, so love the written word."
CJ: "Cool. We will have to get together and compare notes and maybe watch a movie and maybe cuddle. I love to cuddle do u?"
I'm not holding on to it any longer.
Me: "sure I do, but only with someone I'm dating. I have a boyfriend, remember? :p "
CJ: "Sorry, I forgot. He's lucky."
I just sent you a text 10 minutes ago saying I was watching a movie with my boyfriend. You forgot already?
CJ: "You sure? It's only cuddling. ;-) Cuddling isn't cheating"
*sighs*
Me: "Oh, I'm sure. Have a good night."
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